Dad Sneezes
The last few years I have started sneezing differently. Many times the sneezes are very loud, sort of crazy sounding, and can scare anyone in the room. I had no idea this was a “thing” until recently when I learned about “Dad Sneezes.”
Sadly I must confess that I am at an age where I am exploding in public with Dad sneezes at odd moments. These can be wall-shaking booms that scare children, or high pitched sirens that cause dogs to bark from miles away.
Most alarming and embarrassing is the new “Goat Scream Sneeze” which has been added to my repertoire over the last year. Think back to one of those hilarious screaming goat videos, then take it up a notch. Imagine that you were sneak up on one of these goats, grab it by the sides and squeeze are hard as you could while yelling in its ear. Imagine the sound it might make, and you are approaching the terror of these goat sneezes.
I didn’t actually know I could make sounds of such a high pitch or volume.
Now my task is to keep my sense of humor, worry less about being embarrassed, and laugh along with my husband or whoever else the unfortunate soul might be in my vicinity. Getting older is not for the meek, and this is a new and unique feature that I never anticipated.
By the way, if you’re looking for advice about growing older with grace and humor, I encourage you to watch the series of 6 conversations that I had with my friend Dr. Mary White about LOVING MIDLIFE on the new Call Me Beast YouTube channel.
And if I happen to belt out a crazy screaming goat sneeze in your presence, I hope you’ll laugh along with me, and perhaps make sure I’m still breathing and know my name.
Tim Hinton
May 10, 2025
