Lately I find myself asking “Where are the adults?”  We are in a moment where the grown-ups need to step up and speak out.

If a marginalized group is being targeted for political points, the time is here for you to say something.  Don’t let your silence make you complicit in the cruelty.

If you are an ally of the LGBTQ+ community, don’t stand by while drag queens and trans people are vilified for no reason.  Despite what you may have been told, they are not dangerous.  Each of us in this world is just trying to live our own happy and productive lives.  And I don’t want a politician making health care decisions for me and my family.

Behind every trans kid are parents who are agonizing over the choices they are making and doctors who are using their expertise to help their patients.  These parents are using their spiritual advisors and medical professionals to find the right answers for their family.   I trust loving parents and professional doctors more than I do politicians whose main goal is to score political points and divide us into warring camps.

You don’t have to march on your state capital, but you can speak up politely when someone spews lies or conspiracy theories.  A simple “I’m sorry but I don’t agree and that’s not true” can go a long way.  Try saying “I know some drag queens and let me tell you about them.”  Or “I have a friend with a trans child and I know they want to be free to make health care decisions for their family. Don’t you want that?”  And maybe call your representative.

I know drag queens, I know trans people, and I know parents of trans kids.  They are not here to hurt or scare you.  They want what we all want: a happy life where they can be themselves and make the decisions for their family unencumbered by cruelty and fear mongering.  Let’s support them and leave them alone to do just that.

By the way, if you have been kind and interested enough to read all the way to this point, I’ll share one more wakeup call with you.  If you are someone who does not know any drag queens or trans people, or even any gay people, let me inform you that this is because these people do not feel safe letting you know.  These people are all around us and if you don’t know them, you have likely given them a signal that it was not safe to be themselves around you.  And if you are someone who thinks “This could never happen to me” or “I could never have a gay or trans child,” let me inform you that the parents of these kids thought exactly the same thing.  Let’s have some empathy and learn to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes.  You’ll be much better for it.